How to Raise Happy Kids — Peaceful Living with Miranda

Most parents want to raise happy kids.

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We all want to have those bubbly, bouncing, lovable children who make everybody smile and who make the world a better place.

But while some kids find it easy, others can see the world as glass half-full just by default.

Set up the best environment to raise happy kids by using these three practices!

1: Have a set of family values.

If you have ever written down a set of values for your family, you will have a knowledge of what means a lot to you.

This short list is often topped with character traits like consideration, kindness, or self-confidence, right?

Many parents find the gap between the goal of ‘teaching my child to be considerate’ (for example) and the reality that we have to teach them how to, just too wide to bridge.

Having a set of family values means you have something to refer back to when you feel unsure, as a parent or a child.

For instance, if you value honesty, it might mean you can demonstrate the importance of this to your child- at that moment you really did not want to run the onion you forgot to pay for, back into the supermarket!

Doing those small things demonstrates an emphasis on that value-especially when your child sees you didn’t want to do it-and yet you did.

Another value might be family togetherness-and every night you eat dinner together.

As your kids grow, they will probably be doing homework, tv or sport at this time. If this is a family value, you can organise things so most of the time you will be eating together-because this is important to your family.

when your high expectations might be bad for your child

What are your family values?

2: Let them work it out.

Many children these days have more opportunities, more to think about, busier schedules and more ‘freedom’ than many children in earlier generations.

But are the children in these days really happier?

It seems to be universally understood that ‘childhood’ from days past was more ‘fun’ than nowadays.

It is possible that running around the streets or a farm, using their imagination and coming up with weird and wonderful ideas, could have given those children from previous generations more happiness?

Yes, definitely possible.

Kids need to learn to work things out themselves-and that includes being bored.

My recent post about overstimulation and children covers more about this.

Play-based learning is based around this very topic. Children are given basic open-ended toys in a space, then they can choose how to use them in play, construction, or their own idea of play.

The imagination this encourages is endless!

Better imagination often means better problem-solving, better resilience (think ‘how did my tower fall down?’ questions), and just a richer interaction with their play.

This is important factor to cultivate to raise happy kids.

It seems that play-based learning can only help train our kids’ brains to problem solve and create-both of which are instrumental skills and contribute to happy, resilient and present people.

This translates into problem solving on different levels.

While we will be needed to help our child problem-solve sometimes, we also need to be aware that being faced with a problem actually requires kids to learn how to think outside the box.

Don’t fix your kids’ problems all the time, but make sure you let them know you are available if they REALLY can’t think of anything. (Then help them THINK of ideas, not just tell them yours.)

Little problem solving skills are the building blocks of big problem solving skills-because the PROCESS is what they are really learning.

>>If you want to go on a 28-day journey of self-discovery (because, we all need to do this, especially in those times of big emotions), check out the Self Discovery journal on the Resources page!

3: Understand that deep-set values are rarely taught by perfect parents-or learnt by perfect kids.

I mean, it’s all very well to want happy, glamourous kids, and try to be the Insta-perfect family.

Maybe you are that-and well done, if so!

Or maybe you want to shower your kids with love in the form of gifts and experiences.

First of all, let me start by saying you are not wrong in doing these things with your child.

You are clearly acting out of love and good intention for your family and children.

But, as many movies have shown, children do not necessarily need gifts, experiences or the perfect clothing and setting to learn how to be a responsible, creative, caring, considerate and loving adult.

They don’t need us to be the perfect parent in the eyes of the media or the latest ‘fad’-and even though they are fun, they don’t need us to be amazing at Tik Tok, either. (Although it is hilarious!)

If you’re a parent and you are doing all this with your children and still feel like you are falling short?

Hear this: It’s how you interact with your child, not what you give them, that makes the difference.

It’s all about the way you talk to them in a soothing voice-or tell them that they need to pull up their socks.

It’s all about teaching them that you love them, and they can learn to love others in a practical way.

It’s about helping them understand their emotions-so they don’t feel ruled by them.

Learn more about your child's emotions!

Being a 'perfect' parent is this:

You, being yourself and loving your kids as they are. Creating connection with them, showing them what you love and what you have learnt from the world (at their own level).

Most of all, being the ‘perfect parent’ means showing them that you will do anything so they grow up to be the best person they can be-loved, considerate, independent, empathetic, and emotionally mature.

Put simply, you can create an environment for happy kids by:

loving them,
getting intentional about not filling their lives for them,
creating a value base/anchors for your family to refer back to, and
don’t pressure them into being perfect, either!

Create happy kids (or at least help them grow towards it) by using these tips for parenting!

Want to find out more about how you can be the best parent you can?

Need to work on that anger, guilt, or your own inner lack-of-peace?

Miranda is a teacher-turned stress management and emotional wellbeing coach, (and Jesus follower) for ANY mums who are finding life overwhelming and stressful. She has also authored wellbeing books such as ***Stop Mum Guilt*** and fantasy novels, as well as created physical journals and products for women. If you feel overwhelmed, or are sick and tired of feeling that horrible guilt you carry around in your chest for ‘not doing everything well enough’, ***grab your 30% off call here as a new client!***

You can grab your totally free download for mum self care here… (this gives you access to all the emails and helpful information I send out to my amazing tribe!), or find out more about how you can work with me by clicking on the Bookings page link here.

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