Embracing Slow Motherhood might help you be a more present, fulfilled mother. — Peaceful Living with Miranda

Slow motherhood is a new term - but not a new idea - but considering today’s expectations on mothers are so overwhelming, the concept of ‘slow’ anything can be both a huge relief and a challenge for most of us.

This article will cover some simple reasons why slow motherhood can help you become more fulfilled, less stressed, and more present - and not only enjoy your time more with your children, but create a household which is more conducive to helping your children grow up in a less stressful, more peaceful and more developmentally - friendly environment, too.

Embracing slow motherhood can help you be a more present, fulfilled mother. Here’s how!

As we get started, firstly welcome to my space on the internet! I am an Australian emotional health coach and parent consultant - and teacher, too! I share information for Christian women (and anyone) to build their wellbeing, and tips on how to build family connection and your child’s emotional wellbeing, too. you can find out more about what I do here on my About page, or the Emotional Health bookings page. Thanks for reading, and I pray you walk away with something practical to change your life!

For many women, the idea of slow motherhood sounds like a happy dream - or to some, a very challenging idea. Being able to mix happy time with your children with feeling satisfied and ‘in the zone’ as a mama, gardening if you want to, and the more homestead, homeschooling-mama type dream might seem idyllic - but of course it isn’t always that easy!

However, slow motherhood doesn’t have to mean a full transition into something you may or may not want to be. You can start practicing this right now - wherever you are - because while the concept of slow motherhood has some practical outworkings, they all stem from the heart attitude you have.

Here are some reasons why this lifestyle or attitude might be really helpful for you and your family.

Improves emotional health

Slow motherhood removes some of the expectation and mental load from your mum mindset. It’s simple - be OK with doing what you need to, rather than all the things you feel you have to. (Yes, you still need to do the dishes and laundry!)

I’ve learnt this myself - moving from being over-committed to implementing boundaries and having real, authentic conversations with those around me, has created a space where I can work, lead and manage my family well, maintain a relationship with God and also manage our vegie garden, which is very important to our family and myself - and our nutrition!

It’s been hard to adjust to, and yet an absolute joy to spend time making mental time, to be the mama I want to be - and also, the feeling of ‘being chased’ has minimised greatly. (If you’re a mama with ADHD tendencies, or someone who tries to love on your kids and still fit in all the things, and volunteer for different roles in the community & church, resulting in zooming from one spot to the other constantly - then you will know the ‘being chased’ feeling I mean. No one is actually chasing you, but too many responsibilities and the kids growing into different needs and stages, means life can feel like that.)

That results in burnout, and also resentment. Slow motherhood, when we can start taking off the pressure and remembering that, actually, we were created for such a time as this (thanks Esther), and that when we are able to, we don’t have to apologise for spending slow time with our kids, or reading a book for awhile. It’s so, so much better for our emotional health - and definitely lowers some of the mum mental load.

Creates a strong connection with your child.

While I’m not suggesting that slow motherhood or especially stay at home mum life is actually easy, or alone-time-rich (I’ve spent enough time at home with 3 small children to know that is laughable!) but choosing slow motherhood means we are literally choosing the slower, more peaceful mindset, resulting in you spending more time with your children as part of this lifestyle. I’ve been blessed to be able to do this for most of my children’s younger childhood, and being a homemaker has been an amazing privilege - although incredibly hard at times!

A major inspiration behind starting a slow motherhood journey involves having a stronger connection with your child. It’s important to realise that this may not always feel like the case, and also that we don’t want children who are not independent, resilient or are required to make their own decisions.

Slow motherhood doesn’t mean ‘mollycoddling’ your children, or ‘giving in’ to their needs, or whatever anyone might insinuate.

Taking on this mindset means basically prioritising less stress in your mental life, and therefore giving yourself time to appreciate more, spend time with the kids when you can, and do whatever is needed in a more heart-centred way, rather than racing from ‘thing to thing’ and feeling unsatisfied, unfulfilled, and rushed most of your life. This obviously leads into your child’s experience, too - and the way they view the world.

Gives you time to prioritise and plan for what is really important to you

Being overwhelmed can send us into fight-or-flight mode (yes, fawn and freeze are the other two modes now), which means our body literally starts diverting energy into areas of our bodies that are needed for either fighting or fleeing (the majority of this being muscles).

Less blood and energy to the digestive system (yep, that’s why you aren’t that hungry in this state, and stress can cause you to go without eating) and also, less attention to the executive functions of the brain. We start to function from our sympathetic nervous system, our more primal ‘brain’ centre, and this does not prioritise memory, or planning, or prioritising past whether we should run right or left!

God made our brains so amazing - and it’s been a joy to share some information around this from Dr Dan Seigel in my online course for mums of 3-6 year olds ‘The Emotionally Equipped Child’, because understanding that our brains are not on-line for rational thought, means so much when it comes to managing our own emotions and those of our child!

The Emotionally Equipped Child ecourse is a simple 4-module self paced course on Udemy. Each module has a 30-minute (or so) informative video for parents, and then a short video outlining an activity to do with your child to build their emotional regulation and intelligence skills. It’s had great reviews and is so simple to follow! Find out more about the simple, affordable ecourse here!

Initiating your slow motherhood journey means we are intentionally giving ourselves a little more mental space to be able to plan what we want for our kids and family, and then to implement that.

For instance, my time this year remembering and re-implementing some slower motherhood principles has resulted in my being much more organised with food - and having lots of conversations with my husband around what we want to do with our family’s nutrition, and how we would like to overhaul how much sugar the kids eat, and so on. Gut health stuff! But, if I don’t manage this, as the key person for food, cooking and nutrition in our household, it’s not happening.

Prioritising and planning has been a major benefit of recommencing my slow motherhood mindset this year - after a couple of years of a whole journey!

Does slow motherhood mean you don’t work?

This is a very common question or belief behind this concept. In my opinion, slow motherhood is literally a slower mindset, an intentional appreciation for life, a way and attitude to interact with the world and appreciating your children and partner too. It’s about creating a space where they want to come home, and a space where they understand that the world is actually busy, and while that’s fine - having a safe, less stressed and calm space to return to is also absolutely needed.

I do work. I work around my life. I work around my kids - and this also includes at home and out in the workforce. It is a simple fact these days that most families need a second income. If you are a single mama, this is obviously not as easy as you are literally managing the financial load for your family. But regardless, it’s about not being controlled by these things, not being simply rushed from one thing to another - and not booking your children into every extra-curricular activity, either!

It’s hard to implement sometimes - but only because it requires a mindset shift.

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It’s not always easy, but it’s possible!

If you are reading this, and this feels like the dream - but absolutely impossible, I’ve been there. And, if you have tiny kids at home, it may be a season where it feels very hard. But, if you are completely over the hustle, and want to start flipping the script, bringing a more intentional mindset to your home, family, faith and life (because you only get one, right!) - click on my Emotional Health Bookings page here and grab one of my 50 min sessions. It’s worth a conversation, isn’t it?

starting your slow motherhood journey can help you start living the less stressful life you have dreamed of - and the benefits are more than what is listed here.

But, it’s not for everyone. It’s for those who really want it, who want to not be hustling anymore. It’s countercultural. It’s how we were created, in my opinion - otherwise our bodies would thrive on the stress we put them through - and they don’t! It’s about rest - which is Biblical. It’s about creating space.

But most of all, it’s about allowing yourself to embrace where you are in your life - and show your kids that they can do the same thing, regardless of their situation.

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