5 things tired Mums can do when the going gets tough - and you aren’t sure you’re tougher — Peaceful Living with Miranda

If you are reading this post, chances are you’re one of those tired mums - feeling like you’re being spread in too many directions, taking on an ever-bigger mental load, and then dealing with your child’ tiredness.

Yes? If so, keep reading! Today, I’m going to share some ways you can not only survive those hard times, but thrive - even when you are so tired you feel like you are sleeping standing up! Here’s the overview:

Know what your daily to-do’s are
Smash them out in your productive zone
Ask someone for help
Stay on top of the organisation!
Be gentle with yourself
Bonus tip for Christian mums!

Firstly, let me clarify something.

Not sleeping puts your brain under stress, and in fact we now know that our brains don’t wash themselves clean of the daily build-up of toxins, when we don’t have proper sleep.

This is one reason why there are such a myriad of reasons why we need to be prioritising that sleep. I know you are probably saying '‘but that’s why I’m so tired! I’ve tried everything to get more sleep, and it isn’t working!’

Just in case you haven’t been prioritising sleep, here is your reminder to do so. If you are spending time having mum time every night until 2, then your child wakes you up at 4 or 5, then here’s the hard truth: you might need to have mum time every second night, or over the weekend if you can - because if you aren’t getting sleep, your emotional regulation can really suffer, and this brings about yelling at your kids, mum guilt, and so on.

Most of this post is written assuming you are a mum who is tired and exhausted from not being able to get enough sleep - and assuming that you want tips to get by, regardless.

Here are my tried-and-true tips for tired mums!

Know what your daily must - do’s are.

What are those daily need - to - do’s that you need to get into? Which ones do you feel the most mum guilt over if you don’t do? Do the kids have dinner tonight? Do you? What can you do now in order to have that break time later?

Knowing what your daily must - do’s are, means we are building a list for ourselves, basically prioritising what needs to happen in order for our household to continue functioning.

Some simple must-do’s that many mums have include things like:

Certain housework jobs (those core jobs that every household needs, like dishes, laundry, food prep, and hygiene practices such as hair brushing, etc.
Emails - ensuring that emails are being sent as they need to, whether to school, daycare, kindergarten, work colleagues, healthcare
Signing up for memberships like Amazon Prime, or finding out more about other useful things
Managing the everyday finances, shopping and so on

Being on top of these small things creates a cycle of success and organisation - less stress and laying awake when we can sleep, too. In turn, this helps us minimise the overwhelm in our own mental health and lives in general. Let’s face it, it’s nice to know you’ve got the basics covered.

In fact, this also cuts down on the emotional moments we have in front of our children, too - which is something I work through with many of my clients, regularly.

Once you know what these things are, schedule them in (see the next step!).

Smash those to - do’s in your own productive time zone.

For some of us, this means straight after the kids go to bed at night. (OK, that’s just a few of us.) For many of us, especially those of us who run businesses like me, we may be diligent readers of books such as The 5AM Club, or 7 Habits of Highly Effective People - and maybe this means we are in our productive zone first thing we get up in the morning, early.

But, this varies depending on a million factors.

However, pretty much every single day, us mums manage to get things sorted enough to continue feeding, clothing and washing our kids, even if our own hair stays unwashed.

So, take note of when that time is. When do you feel most motivated? Why? What helps - is it pumping Spotify loudly through these epic headphones while the kids have their morning TV time? Is it when they have their nap?

If it’s at a practical time, and it means you can get a few minutes in to do those practical tasks, then do it at that time.

Using your productive time is a good, healthy, self-aware way to get stuff done. Use this Mum Life Printable Planner to get things organised!

And now - the third thing tired mums do when the going gets tough.

Ask someone for help.

When the going gets tough, some of us get laser-focused. Others, get lost in overwhelm and brain fog, trying to cast about to work out what to do next. Right? But whether we are unfocused or focused, we need to remember that we are often part of a community. We are part of a group, somewhere, that just might be willing to help us out. Sometimes help looks like a meal, or your sister doing your washing. Sometimes it looks like sharing care of you and a friends’ children, and taking it in turns.

It can even look like having another mum over for a coffee, and sharing your journey together.

Tired mums who get through those hard times, often do so by remembering that we were made for community, not for isolation. We were not made to raise a family on our own, inside our own heads and houses. It’s important that we share life together as we can. This will often mean that you are supporting another mum just as much as she is supporting you. It’s not you being needy, it’s you being honest. And that, is called authenticity!

Successful Tired mums Stay on top of the organisation.

If we aren’t organised, everything falls onto our heads, right? If we don’t stay on top of what needs to be done, we often end up overwhelmed, red-faced as we realise our kids aren’t dressed up for that casual clothes day when everyone else is; and we then have a monumental task to get back in front of ourselves again.

(Can you relate!? I know I can!)

It’s so important to make sure you know what is going on, and this is one lesson it can take awhile to learn. While it needs to be OK to fail, forget, and give ourselves grace, and it’s a huge lesson in boundaries to learn how to say no to too many things - just dealing with everyday moments as a mum means we need to make sure we know what is happening next.

tired mums are gentle with themselves.

I say it all the time to my clients - be gentle with yourself. You do not have to be so hard on yourself. If you feel like you can’t give yourself a break, you may be treating yourself way too harshly - and many women subconsciously give themselves only high expectations and little self compassion - which can be what they disliked about their parents.

Phew. So, if you are struggling with the fact that you just can’t switch off, try a little self compassion. You know what - you won’t fall apart if you mentally tell yourself ‘Good work’ every now and then. (Just ‘good work’ or ‘you are acing this’ - not ‘good work, you could have done it better’ or ‘well done, but xxxx was a shocker!’)

Give yourself a little grace, and treat yourself how you want to be treated. Don’t run yourself into the ground, and start giving yourself the same courtesy you give to others - the emotional space to have a growth mindset, fail, and be allowed to try again without mentally whipping yourself.

Sick of giving yourself a hard time? Listen to The Mum Wellbeing Podcast episode here: Impacting your Inner Critic

A bonus tip right here for Christian women - another thing we should always be open to, is to pray.

When times get tough, it reminds us of how much we need God, and how everything we have, is actually His to share with us. In my opinion, God has a soft spot for tired mums who are raising a family. It’s a big deal. So, pray and ask Him to be with you. While this doesn’t take the tiredness away (and that’s why I’m a Christian life Coach who helps mums of faith too), it means we have someone to go through the day with.

Many tired mums who are also Christian women, feel like they ‘have to’ be doing all the things, to be accepted. Umm… how about the part where we are saved by God, not works? Even if you feel guilted into something, it’s not a reason to become even more insanely worn out and tired. Pray, listen and seek what you are supposed to be doing - because growing a family (and not just when you’re dealing with the baby routines - teenagers, kids, they all need us equally, just in different ways) is a BIG deal. It’s also honorable in the sight of God. So remember that when you feel like you’re not doing ‘enough’.

If you want to go from tired, frustrated Christian mama to feeling encouraged, less stressed and actually free (like we’re meant to be), make sure you book a package with me here - it can be 2, 4 or 8 sessions, depending on what length of support you want!

It has always been challenging seeing how all the tired mums go about their day, and I can see the exhaustion - I know it all too well myself.

However, while these things seem small, they will impact your life if you do them, even in small ways.

It’s the small, regular, consistent things we do that make the biggest difference.

Peace,

Miranda xx

Easy product links you might like to check out:

Simple monthly calendar printable here >>

Mum Life Planner printable>>

Stop Mum Guilt ebook on Kindle and other book recommendations>>

The Emotionally Equipped Child ecourse (4 simple modules, activities for your child’s emotional regulation and your understanding of their emotional processes. Self paced.)

Need to tackle that mum guilt… less overwhelm…and feel like *you* again?

Miranda is a teacher-turned Christian life coach, stress management and emotional wellbeing coach, for mums both spiritual and not, who are finding life overwhelming and stressful. She also authors wellbeing books such as Stop Mum Guilt and fantasy novels, as well as creates physical journals and products for women. If you feel overwhelmed, or are sick and tired of feeling that horrible guilt you carry around in your chest for ‘not doing everything well enough’, grab your 30% off call here as a new client!

**Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links, which may provide me with a small commission at no cost to you. Thanks for supporting my business!**

5 things tired Mums can do when the going gets tough - and you aren’t sure you’re tougher